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How to celebrate Thanksgiving when you’re not close to your family
How to celebrate Thanksgiving when you’re not close to your family
Thanksgiving is only a day away and most Americans have solidified their family plans for the holiday. Whether you’re hosting the big meal or heading to a relative’s house, the holidays are often a chance to reconnect with loved ones. However, Thanksgiving Day isn’t always a family-oriented occasion. Over the years, several studies have found that the seemingly joyous holiday season isn’t always easy for everyone. In a survey conducted by the AARP Foundation in 2017, 31 per cent of respondents said they felt lonely during the holidays throughout the last five years. Meanwhile, 41 per cent of participants were concerned about a family member or friend feeling lonely around the holidays. In 2020, a survey conducted by ValuePenguin also found that 70 per cent of respondents struggled with different types of loneliness before Thanksgiving and Christmas, partly due to the effects of the Covid-19 pandemic. While socially-distanced holiday parties have mostly become a thing of the past since then, there’s still many reasons why some people spend the season by themselves. Some Americans have family members living on the opposite side of the country, or world, while others may not have a close relationship with their relatives at all. There’s no one concrete way to spend the holidays, and everyone has their own reasons why they choose not to see certain people on Thanksgiving. Speaking to The Independent, Emma Mahony, a therapist at Better Life Therapy based in Pennsylvania, acknowledged that, when we spend the holidays alone, our feelings of loneliness can be heightened. While everyone experiences loneliness in a different way, Mahony believes that the feeling could be tied to how Thanksgiving has been portrayed over the years. “I think a lot of the anxieties and concerns that come up have to do with unmet expectations of what you think a holiday is supposed to look like, and what you think your relationship with your family or your friends is supposed to look like,” she said. “I think that’s where a lot of people themselves feel a little bit of a stressful state. Just maybe feeling a little let down by the expectations they have for themselves, after watching other people experience the holidays differently than them.” The holidays are often referred to as the most wonderful time of the year, but that doesn’t ring true for everyone. In some cases, the winter months can be quite a triggering time, and potentially a reminder to people of how they’ve been hurt by those closest to them. According to Mahony, the best way to manage those feelings of animosity is by creating your own perspective about the holidays and new ways to celebrate. “I think you should allow yourself to reframe it as: ‘Okay, how do I want the holidays to look for me? Who are the people that I do want in my life? Who are the people that I don’t want in my life?’” she advised. “Don’t try to make something that shouldn’t happen happen. Instead, recreate your own memories and your own traditions, and give yourself space and permission to do so. But also, if you know that it’s going to be a hard time for you, create that support system, from reaching out to a therapist or to a close friend.” For those who do have a close support system, it can make skipping out on Thanksgiving dinner a little easier. On the other hand, your cousins may miss sitting next to you at the dinner table. Still, Mahony believes we shouldn’t try to convince our family members to attend an event in which they’ve already opted out. “If someone decides they don’t want to be with you over the holidays, respect that choice for them,” she explained. “Don’t make them feel bad for prioritising themselves and their needs. [It] will potentially, you know, make things worse long term. I just honour that everyone needs to do what’s best for them, whether that be financially, emotionally, or physically.” Even if you decide to celebrate Thanksgiving this year without your family, it doesn’t mean that you’re entirely on your own. Mahony suggested setting up a Zoom call or FaceTime with some friends, or planning a fun meal if you’re worried about eating solo. “You could really do whatever you want, so I would set up things for yourself to look forward to,” she said. For those who are spending the holiday alone, but still want to take part in Thanksgiving-related activities, spend the morning or afternoon at a local homeless centre. You can continue the day by hosting a Friendsgiving dinner or movie night with your pals who are still in town. When it comes to food, you can cook a mini turkey for one or ditch Thanksgiving dinner altogether and order take-out at a local restaurant. Then, close out the night with some early Black Friday shopping online or in person. Although this Thursday is indeed a federal holiday, who says the day can’t feel like any other? Ultimately, how you spend Thanksgiving is entirely up to you and there’s no right or wrong way to celebrate the holidays. Remember that you shouldn’t be too hard on yourself for avoiding family during the holiday season. “If Thanksgiving looks different for you year after year, that’s okay. There’s not a specific way to spend the holidays and no family looks the same,” Mahoney said. “If you’re coming to terms with the fact that being with your family for the holidays isn’t what’s best for you, give yourself a little bit of compassion there. “It will get easier over the years, as you figure out how to take care of yourself better.”
2023-11-23 05:50
Markets in a holiday mood
Markets in a holiday mood
By Lewis Krauskopf A look at the day ahead in Asian markets from Lewis Krauskopf, markets correspondent. Markets
2023-11-23 05:49
Inside the Coups and Concessions That Brought Altman Back to OpenAI
Inside the Coups and Concessions That Brought Altman Back to OpenAI
The braintrust that turned OpenAI into the world’s best-known artificial intelligence startup huddled at Sam Altman’s home in
2023-11-23 04:29
Investors expected to vote against Brookfield's $10.6 billion bid for Australia's Origin Energy
Investors expected to vote against Brookfield's $10.6 billion bid for Australia's Origin Energy
By Scott Murdoch and Lewis Jackson SYDNEY A Brookfield-led consortium's A$16.3 billion ($10.61 billion) bid for Origin Energy
2023-11-23 04:28
Bank of Canada Says Rates May Be ‘Restrictive Enough’
Bank of Canada Says Rates May Be ‘Restrictive Enough’
Bank of Canada Governor Tiff Macklem said policymakers may have done enough to tame inflation, reinforcing market and
2023-11-23 04:24
Warren Buffett Says His Will Is Going to Be ‘Simple’ and Public
Warren Buffett Says His Will Is Going to Be ‘Simple’ and Public
Warren Buffett said that the donation of his fortune to charitable causes after his death will be open
2023-11-23 03:55
Hospitals’ Appetite for Borrowing Returns After Pandemic Years
Hospitals’ Appetite for Borrowing Returns After Pandemic Years
Hospitals are returning to the municipal-bond market after shying away since the pandemic. The sector is now “through
2023-11-23 03:48
Argentina President-Elect Taps Oil Vet to Run State Energy Firm
Argentina President-Elect Taps Oil Vet to Run State Energy Firm
Argentina president-elect Javier Milei is turning to a longtime oil-industry executive to lead the nation’s state-run energy company
2023-11-23 03:20
Trump Ramps Up Ads in Early-Voting States to Fend Off DeSantis, Haley
Trump Ramps Up Ads in Early-Voting States to Fend Off DeSantis, Haley
Former President Donald Trump has put $1.5 million toward new ad buys in early voting states, in what
2023-11-23 03:20
Disney’s ‘Wish’ Confronts Shrinking Thanksgiving Box Office
Disney’s ‘Wish’ Confronts Shrinking Thanksgiving Box Office
Recent box-office history is working against Walt Disney Co.’s newest film, the animated musical Wish. Thanksgiving has historically
2023-11-23 03:20
Shakhtar Donetsk talent attracting interest from top clubs in England & Europe
Shakhtar Donetsk talent attracting interest from top clubs in England & Europe
Shakhtar Donetsk midfield starlet Georgiy Sudakov is emerging as a player of interest to a host of leading clubs in the Premier League and across Europe, 90min understands.
2023-11-23 03:17
OpenAI Engineers Earning $800,000 a Year Turn Rare Skillset Into Leverage
OpenAI Engineers Earning $800,000 a Year Turn Rare Skillset Into Leverage
OpenAI reinstated Chief Executive Officer Sam Altman after hundreds of workers threatened to quit over the ChatGPT creator's
2023-11-23 02:53
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