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If there’s one thing associated with teenagers more than anything else, it’s moodiness. But although low mood is extremely common in teens, what’s just as common is that parents don’t know what to do about it. Adolescence is the highest risk period of life to experience depression, and half of adult mental health disorders start before the age of 15, says consultant clinical psychologist Dr Beth Mosley, who provides specialist mental health support to children and their families. “Seeing the signs of low mood in your teen can be worrying if you’re a parent,” she says. “The questions you may ask are likely to be, what are the usual highs and lows of adolescence, and what is something to worry about? Why might my teen be struggling with low mood, and most importantly, what can I do as a parent to help if my teen is feeling down and showing signs of disengaging with life?” Mosley, the author of new book, Happy Families, which is about the most common issues affecting children’s mental health and how parents can help, says although everyone will, at some point, experience low mood, sadness, irritability and loss of interest in things they enjoy, usually such feelings are linked to problems in life. But changes associated with puberty, and brain restructuring, mean adolescents are especially vulnerable to mental health problems, says Mosley, who explains: “These changes increase the possible impact of life stressors and, thus, their vulnerability to mental health difficulties. “The brain changes in adolescence mean teens feel emotions more intensely – both the highs and lows – meaning it’s not unusual to see them experiencing waves of low mood, particularly in the face of challenges.” She says if a teen’s low mood doesn’t go away, and prevents them doing the things they need to, like schoolwork and spending time with others, it would be wise to consider seeking help. The teen’s school may be able to suggest local support. But she adds: “Whether your teen experiences passing or more persistent low mood, the good news is that the brain is flexible and ripe for learning in adolescence, so there’s a lot we can do to support our teens when they’re experiencing low mood. “Importantly, this support will likely improve your relationship with your teen, and help protect them from developing mental health difficulties in adulthood.” If your teenager’s mood is low, these are the things Mosley says might help them… Encourage them to do what’s important to them When someone feels low, they tend to do less of what’s important to them, meaning they get less rewards from life and feel lower, Mosley explains. This is the low-mood cycle. Conversely, by doing more of what’s important to them regularly, they get more reward from life and start to feel better – this is the feel-good cycle, she says. So rather than a teen waiting until they feel better to do the things that are important to them, low-mood teens should do them now to break the low-mood cycle. “Determining what activities they can do more of and what unhelpful activities to do less is a key first step,” says Mosley. “You can support your child by providing more opportunities to do what’s important to them and increasing access to rewards. Give them practical support to do the activities they enjoy, provide encouragement.” Communicate better with them Mosley says that low mood can make it difficult for teens to communicate, but parents learning key communication skills can support how they communicate with their teens and, in turn, help improve their mood. She says being careful how you say things, through tone of voice and nonverbal body language, is important, as teens are more sensitive to criticism and negative social feedback. But there are six communication skills in particular that parents should try to use. They are… Picking the right time to have a conversation. “Open and honest conversations are most likely to happen when we’re feeling calm and not under pressure,” says Mosley, explaining that it’s important to be aware of when your teen isn’t in the right frame of mind for a difficult conversation, and to learn to respectfully pause the conversation and reschedule it for a better time. Starting a sentence with ‘I’ rather than ‘You’ can make a huge difference, explains Mosley, who says starting with ‘You’ often has a blaming tone and makes the teenager defensive and stops them from listening, whereas starting with ‘I’ can explain how you’re feeling, which can’t be disputed and starts a whole different conversation. Instead of over-generalising and using words like ‘always’ or ‘never’, Mosley says it’s much better for parents to be specific and provide an example of a recent event, rather than things that have happened over months or years. She says over-generalising is more likely to make teens feel awful, and less likely to spark a collaborative conversation. Imagining how a young person might feel in/about a certain situation can also help, she says. “Understanding someone else’s point of view, and expressing this to them, can make it easier to have a collaborative conversation and avoid an argument,” she explains. “When we’re particularly worried about our children, thinking about how they feel can sometimes help us connect with them.” If you go into a conversation with your child knowing what you want from it but being aware you might not get it, be prepared with some alternative solutions, Mosley advises. “Having a few solutions in your back pocket before you go into a discussion enables you to show you’re willing to compromise so you don’t get stuck in a stalemate situation,” she says. Although you may not initially get the response you hoped for from your child when you try a new way of communicating with them, it’s vital to persevere, stresses Mosley, who explains: “With these communication hacks we should begin to see communication with our children become healthier and more productive.” Tackle your negative thoughts and help your teenager do it too Mosley advises parents to reduce the habit of getting stuck in negative thinking by trying these tactics, which she suggests should be shared and modelled to teens. Remember it’s just a thought and it doesn’t mean it’s real. “Remind your teen that thoughts are not facts, they are ideas and they don’t predict the future,” says Mosley. Let negative thoughts come and go, rather than fixating on them and becoming overwhelmed, she advises, and take the power out of the thought by sharing it with others. “Getting another viewpoint can stop unhelpful thoughts growing in magnitude,” she says, and suggests parents provide opportunities for teens to share their thoughts with them, on car journeys and walks etc. As many young people get stuck on social media, dwelling on distressing thoughts, Mosley suggests: “Help your teen notice this cycle and learn the art of moving to another activity, even if it’s just moving to a different room or doing some physical activity.” She adds: “If your teen is feeling negative and self-critical, move away from nagging and towards helping them refocus their energy on something they enjoy and/or resolving the underlying problem.” Happy Families: How to Protect and Support Your Child’s Mental Health by Dr Beth Mosley is published by Bluebird on August 31, priced £18.99. 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Arsenal stylishly cruised into the Champions League knockout stages as Group B winners by thrashing French club Lens 6-0 at Emirates Stadium. The Premier League leaders kicked off needing just a point to reach the last 16 of the competition following PSV Eindhoven’s 3-2 comeback win at Sevilla earlier on Wednesday evening. Mikel Arteta’s men duly delivered in devastating fashion thanks to first-half goals from Kai Havertz, Gabriel Jesus, Bukayo Saka, Gabriel Martinelli and Martin Odegaard. Substitute Jorginho completed the scoring with a late penalty, awarded following VAR intervention for a handball by Abdukodir Khusanov. A one-sided encounter in north London was marred slightly by visiting fans throwing a lit flare at home supporters in the aftermath of Saka’s 23rd-minute strike. With first place in the pool emphatically secured with a game to spare, Gunners boss Arteta now has the luxury of being able to rotate his squad for next month’s visit to Eindhoven amid a hectic December fixture list which could determine the seriousness of his side’s title ambitions. The Spaniard made just two changes from Saturday’s dramatic 1-0 win at Brentford, which moved the Gunners top of the table. Havertz was recalled as reward for his late winner against the Bees, while on-loan goalkeeper David Raya was restored having been cup-tied against his parent club. Arsenal controlled proceedings from the first whistle and quickly blew away last season’s Ligue 1 runners-up. The recalled Havertz, who had already headed narrowly wide, capitalised on static defending to open the scoring in the 13th minute, poking beyond France keeper Brice Samba from close range following Jesus’ nod down. Lens’ vocal travelling support responded by throwing a pyrotechnic device on to the field before quickly seeing the game run away from their outclassed team. Jesus doubled the hosts’ advantage in the 21st minute, calmly sidestepping Kevin Danso and coolly slotting past Samba following strong running from Saka. England forward Saka quickly added to the punishment by finishing with his left thigh on the rebound after Samba poorly parried Martinelli’s initial effort. That unorthodox finish led to unsavoury scenes as an active flare was launched from the away end into home spectators in the tier above. Dominant Arsenal continued to shine brighter on the pitch and Martinelli lit up the contest with a wonderful fourth with only 27 minutes on the clock. The Brazil international raced away down the left flank and then cut inside Przemyslaw Frankowski to curl a sumptuous finish into the far corner. Arsenal’s first defeat of the season came in the reverse fixture in northern France at the start of October. On this evidence, most inside the ground must have been wondering how, albeit Lens’ Facundo Medina rattled the right post from distance during a rare foray forward. That proved to a fleeting moment of positivity for the away side, who went into the break 5-0 down after Odegaard expertly volleyed home Takehiro Tomiyasu’s cross. Arteta used a more subdued second period to rest some of his star names, with Saka and the outstanding Declan Rice among those withdrawn. Substitute Reiss Nelson came close to adding to the visitors’ embarrassment but his deflected effort was repelled by former Nottingham Forest keeper Samba. Lens’ misery was completed four minutes from time when Jorginho calmly sent Samba the wrong way from the spot after substitute Khusanov was punished for handling on review. Read More Erik ten Hag says Manchester United ‘have to learn’ from Galatasaray draw Man Utd set to face Galatasaray in Champions League despite bad weather Judd Trump marches into UK Championship quarter-finals Luke Donald humbled by players’ support for his return as Ryder Cup captain Exeter’s Rob Baxter urges football law-makers to be careful over sin-bins trial Defender Manuel Akanji admits Man City made ‘a lot of mistakes’ against Leipzig

By the time Declan Rice eventually took to the pitch on his return to West Ham, his rescue mission had begun to look like an impossible task. The smattering of boos that greeted the return of only the third West Ham captain in history to lift a major honour were quickly drowned out by a rapturous roar. Rice had only been on for a matter of moments when Jarrod Bowen’s deflected strike cannoned in off Aaron Ramsdale and with it, Rice’s old club led his new club by three goals. By the end, Arsenal crashed out of the Carabao Cup with barely a whimper. This was not a happy homecoming for Rice – it was a terrible night for Arsenal, a difficult evening for Ramsdale, and a regretful one for Mikel Arteta, whose side were second-best throughout. Rice’s introduction off the bench came too late, as did the arrivals of Bukayo Saka, Gabriel Martinelli and Martin Odegaard, who fired a consolation goal that was barely even acknowledged in the 95th minute. Arsenal took this fourth-round tie lightly and were punished: West Ham and David Moyes pulled off their plan and played the occasion well. They thoroughly deserved their place in the quarter-finals. After Rice helped inspire West Ham to the Europa Conference League last season, delivering a fitting send-off on his final appearance for the club, it could be that the Hammers win another trophy before he does. Rice, of course, has bigger goals than the Carabao Cup, but it could be that the competition serves as the perfect way for West Ham to build on last season’s success. Bowen and Lucas Paqueta were excellent, but the game’s outstanding moment came with Mohammed Kudus’s stunning second for the hosts. West Ham have invested the Rice money wisely. Arsenal, though, had their lack of depth exposed. Arteta’s side looked flat from the start and the concession of a cheap corner invited West Ham to roll numbers forward and into the box. While Tomas Soucek grappled with Ramsdale on the goalline, Bowen aimed towards the front post with plenty of pace and whip. There was no West Ham player in sight but Arsenal got themselves into a mess: with Ramsdale pushing past Soucek and crashing the back of Gabriel, Ben White, caught behind Kai Havertz, positioned in the wrong place, bundled into the net with his newly bleached blonde head. The blame from an Arsenal perspective deserved to be shared around, yet the focus naturally fell on Ramsdale. The England international had his shirt pulled and felt he was fouled, if VAR was used in the Carabao Cup fourth round then it may have been overturned. Yet his appeals towards referee Anthony Taylor were in vain and an important night for the goalkeeper was off to a difficult start. Perhaps Ramsdale, clearly Arsenal’s No 2 now despite Arteta’s curious claim that he would be rotated with David Raya, felt under more pressure than he usually would have been before he was dropped. There was certainly a sense of unease and panic in Arsenal’s defence. Ramsdale and Gabriel invited pressure as Arsenal struggled to play out, which played into West Ham’s hands. The hosts were up for it, Bowen raising the crowd with a challenge deep in Arsenal’s half, West Ham then forcing another corner with their subsequent press. Ramsdale was again targeted by Soucek and although West Ham finished the half without having a shot on target, registering just over 32 per cent of the possession, it felt as if Moyes’s side carried the greater threat on the counter-attack. Arsenal were slow and ponderous, and it was no surprise to see Rice was summoned to begin his warm-up midway through the first half, greeted by a warm, rippling standing ovation from much of the London Stadium. After making changes, Arteta left himself with the security of a high-quality bench and it quickly became clear that Rice, Saka, Odegaard and Martinelli would be needed. Despite their possession, Havertz’s flicked header that forced an instinctive save from Lukasz Fabianski was the closest the visitors came. But half-time came and went without any changes and Arsenal were almost punished within seconds of the restart. Paqueta slipped in Bowen with a reverse pass and Ramsdale was required to stretch his arms to deny the forward’s clever chip. White, this time, cleared the danger as he beat Kudus to the rebound. Still Rice warmed up, the intensity of his sprints on the touchline quickening, and it was just at the moment of the West Ham supporters bantering with their former captain that he “should have signed for a big club” that the Hammers doubled their lead. Although not on the pitch, perhaps Rice could have been credited with the assist: it was with some of the record £105m that West Ham received for Rice this summer that led to the Hammers signing a player of the calibre of Kudus from Ajax. If Kudus has sparkled so far for West Ham with a couple of eye-catching goals and contributions, this was the 23-year-old’s most impressive yet. Controlling a high, diagonal pass, Kudus skilfully directed his touch to cut inside Zinchenko. Then, with the yard of space he had created, Kudus fired a zipping strike through the legs of Gabriel. Arteta could not wait any longer: on came Rice to more than a few boos, soon followed by Saka and Martinelli, and then Odegaard. But by then it was too late: another White header caused chaos for Arsenal, only this time it set up Bowen on the edge of the box. Bowen’s strike took a slight deflection off Jakub Kiwior, which left a rather awkward-looking Ramsdale only able to parry the volley into his own net. Rice seemed to struggle on his return, with passes overhit to cheers from the home fans. It was only with the introduction of Odegaard that Arsenal began to look more like themselves, but when the captain fired a low finish past Fabianski in the 95th minute, there was barely anyone left in the away end to applaud it. Read More Declan Rice booed by West Ham fans on return to London Stadium Carabao Cup draw: Liverpool, Newcastle and more discover fate Why Declan Rice returns to West Ham as Arsenal’s ‘Van Dijk’ signing West Ham vs Arsenal LIVE: Carabao Cup result, final score and reaction Everton end emotional week with win at West Ham thanks to Calvert-Lewin goal West Ham vs Everton LIVE: Latest Premier League updates

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